october 11, 2005
yesterday at work i didnt talk to anyone. had some rock playing all day. my boss was absent so it was a good opportunity to goof off but i worked like a man possessed. i skipped my breaks and only took a short lunch.. at my desk. i was supposed to be doing some studying after work but just blew it off and went home. ate some leftovers for dinner and then lifted some weights. no tv... just listening to the radio. monday night football was on but decided to skip. yankees played last night but skipped it also. tried sleeping at 9. dozed off for awhile. had weird visions that woke me up @ 11:30. wrote a fawking poem about it. this thing took me 5 minutes to come up with. had to find a piece of paper to put it down into words before i lost the feeling.

written by chol henry 10/10/2005 11:55 pm
this poem is copyrighted so don`t steal without giving me proper credit, aite?

          "untitled"
i toss and turn inside my bed
fighting voices that was in my head
a constant scene for which i dread
one of which would leave me dead
your voice, your face that seems so real
i reach out to touch you but nothing i feel
a constant vision that remains
is holding my gun, blowing out my brains
its soothing voice that seems to say
put me in your mouth and pull away
the trigger that will end your pain
the only price will be your brain
for when its done you`ll hurt no more
millions have done it all before
trust in me you wont feel a thing
it`ll be over in an instant,
and peace it`ll bring.
i toss and turn inside my bed
fighting the thoughts that wants me dead
i hate that gun
i hate life more
so i place it in my mouth and count to four
bang. the pain stops here.