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I was a cocky( in terms of interpersonal relationshipz) naive, self righteous, and spoiled. In terms of guyz ( the ones i fell for) i was clingy, jealous, possesive, and non trusting...in terms of self..i was non decisive, non assertive...and a plain ol push over. My life used to be full of pain, but i finally said NO MORE. Thre differenc between now and then is that i finally have help.....

Forever in a Day !Jun. 22, 2005

Bare with me on this one.

Love, like life is not meant to last forever. Sometimes our mind lead us to places and paths our hearts can't quite weather. I think about you, i think about life. I think about where im heading and wonder if it's right. I can't undo the pain i've caused, re-bandage old wounds, or keep paying for things i thought were solved. It's unlikely that two wrongs shall make this right, it's something i can't ignore, something I can't fight. The power you have over me..the hold you have on my heart...is this love real, or just something to keep me out  the dark? Everyone just wants to do the right thing..even  if tha thing has the worst  timing. If you love someone , let them go, .... but wha if they come back, and it's still hard to go,... on, wondering, if what they feel for you is true, if the object of their affection is actually  you.  Wha  happened to you during the time of their departure...waiting..wondering.. when and where will the love be recaptured. Is that really fair? That all tha time spent sitting there, watching him love someone else...burying the pain deep inside yourself. But now he's back...this is what you want, you tell yourself that, but now it's not the same...maybe it can't be, maybe it won't ever be again, in your heart if hurts to think of it ending tha way, but deep down you know tha love once forever can be lost in a day.
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