Jan. 24, 2006 - sad

I'm not mad at Emma. I just don't really feel like talking to her right now. After Saturday I've just been depressed and being around her and talking to her makes me even more so. I just need a few more days to get over the loss. Then I think I'll be fine. I'm just not ready to laugh and joke with her like we did before Saturday. I feel like someone breaking up with their girlfriend / boyfriend by saying this but it's not her it's me. I guess I just wanted to go to state so bad that I still haven't gotten over the shock of not making it. We had a chance, we made it to finals and I was on my way to Williston laughing and joking with my mom and sisters. When I got that call it felt like my whole world was coming down on top of me. I felt like a terminally ill person being told that there was nothing else that anyone could do, that they had a month to live. My happiness at making it to finals was replaced by an insurmountable saddness that didn't compare to anything I've ever experienced before. I cried for nearly 30 minutes straight afterward and then sporatically throughout the rest of the night. I hate Plentywood and all it stands for. If I were given the chance to drop a bomb on any town of my choosing in the world, it would be Plentywood.

~Rai Thompson~