Time to kick myself up the backside

I'm feeling quite low today, even though the sun is shining.

I've got such a low opinion of myself, my self esteem is at rock bottom, I look awful and feel even worse.

My relationship is dragging me down further, I've tried being nice as regards ending it with him but he still won't accept it.  This weekend I can see lots of fireworks happening as my son is going off to his dads which will give me the opportunity to finally try and make him understand that it's finished once and for all.  I don't want to be a ***** about ending it, he's a lovely guy but I don't love him anymore, I don't fancy him and can't bear him to touch me.  I want out and he's just going to have to accept it.  I don't want to be horrible in ending it, last time he begged and begged me to try again and I relented - BIG mistake. 

I guess that's why I'm so down as I know this is coming, but at the same time I can't wait.  I feel a bit like a chick inside an egg that's just got to wait a couple more days before breaking out to freedom!

All I want is to be on my own, time for me to sort my head, heart and home out, without the restrictions I felt from being with him.