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well, tonight was fun. me and david went to the mall. i got this awesome shirt. it's a michael myers halloween shirt. *muah* wonderful. then haley and mitch showed up. we ate and went downtown. we sat by a waterfountain while haley snapped pictures like a ho. haha. yea she did. then we started goofing off. haley slapped mitch in the nuts and he got like...really mad. he overreacted. and haley got upset. it's not cool, b/c when they play and mitch hurts her...she doesn't get mad. no she doesn't. she lives with it. but, she started crying because he walked off. so i sat in her lap and she cried on my chest. *true friends* then her feet started hurting so i sat down beside her. i sung to her "lean on me. when you're not strong. i'll be your strength. i'll help you carry on.". yea i sung it to her. she calmed down for a minute, then she started crying heavy...and she was shaking and i just held her. i felt so bad for her. so bad. i got sad, because she was sad. and we're like..connected. so yea. sure. whatever. anyways, we walked off so that she could go home. mitch called and said he was on his way. she like..latched on to me.i didn't want her to leave. i love her. so much. even though i get uber jealous of her a lot.lol.

then haley left. me and david hung out downtown a bit longer. it was lots of fun. then we got some food and came home.

then we watched Saw. for half the movie i sat in my computer chair. then i moved to the bed with david. and i was hoping to God that i wouldn't get in trouble with that move. my dad walked in to check on us later and didnt' say anything..so. yea. it was nice. i enjoyed laying in his arms. it's wonderful.

so yea. sometimes..opposite the times i hate my bf...i love him. yes. i do. i'm just a ***** i think.

i just want to be alone right now though. unless david could be here to hold me. i wouldn't want talking though. just..quiet. i want to fall asleep in his arms.

my weakness is that i care too much.

isn't that the truth.

i do not want to grow up. but i am. and i have to accept that. it's like the quote: everything changes. acceptance comes next.

i think i'm gonna grow up and be one of these business people who devote all their time to work and forget what the word fun means. then it'll be like the movies and someone will come into my life and put the word fun back in my vocabulary. and i'll realize that all these years spent on work were pointless. but..that probably won't happen. b/c my life isn't a movie. even though i'd like it to be. b/c in movies..things always work out..and there is always a happy ending. so yea. i'd love my life to be a movie.

i think of my life as a movie.

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