so i've been thinking.
i dont think i'm mature enough for mike.
[[no i'm not saying i'm breaking up with him dumbass]]
i mean..i keep looking at girls..or ..women..his age..
and it makes me feel unworthy or something.
i dont look the part.
i dont dress the part.
i dont feel like i'm fit for him.

i feel like..maybe i should dress more maturely..

act more maturely.

i dont know.

i'm confused and confusing myself.

but...how do chiks his age act?

am i supposed to give stuff up?

i dont want to do that.

i'm not going to do that.

he's ok with who i am.

at least..i hope he is.

and i hope he's not just avoiding that subject.

f*ck.

i'm so effing confused.

i think it's just cause i've been stressing.

and i'm tired.

and i'm bored and have nothing else to do

but worry and ponder and stupid stuff like that.

but...i dont know.

like..i was just on myspace..

and i looked at my picture..

and i'm like "i dont even look like i'm old enough to be with him"

i dont look mature.

not to me.

my face isn't mature.

:(

what's wrong with me?????

i'm sure if this was a problem, i'd know my know.

and i guess i just..if i really met his teacher friends..

i'd want to impress them.

and i'd want to impress his parents.

i dont want them to think he's dating some immature bratty teenager.

i dont want them to to think that he could do better..

because i'm young..

or dont think like them...

cause i haven't experienced all that they have.

or even a little.

but that wouldn't be being myself..

and that's what i should do..right?

be myself?

right?

or...wrong?

i dont know what to do ...at all.

what if i meet his parents and they dont like me?

what if his sister dont like me?

:(

what if?